sometime i wonder what am i doing?..... what am i doing for?..... what am i?.... what my feelings means....... seriously sometime i dun even understand what i am doing n thinking. always have a sudden blank in my brain. i realise i tends to let people misunderstand me... and also realise there issit people who really understand me ba... i always wonder..... wonder who i am, what am i doing? what am i doing for? am i doing the right thing? what am i going to be? tons of what questions that i will nv be able to answer it.
as i continue to wonder......................
and after all it is still a blank.... 0_0!?
About Me
- Sinnie
- i am the dreamer feeding on dreams they say i think/dream too much Since the break of dawn fragment of dreams
2 comments:
haha i think it's great you're wondering bcos if u didn't, u wld be a zombie.
ask>> search>> growth ask>> search>> growth >> ...
otherwise we will be a stagnant water breeding mosquitoes ahaha! i think so la. wonder if it's the 3yr plan making everyone go a bit mad. LOL but it's good!
and i suppose this is smth we will nvr find the answer to bcos we always change so we will always have to ask from time to time :D
and u'll never know if u're doing the right thing until it's done and u can look back on it, way in the future. unfortunately. ahha
oh yeah. and i think this is true:
"You have made us for yourself, and our hearts are restless until they find rest in You." - St. Augustine
The 'You' refers to God and obviously i am not that enthu about promoting religion (simply bcos i dun knw that deep/ much about it and i dun want to argue the wrong thing and annoy ppl only to later find out i have been preaching the WRONG thing LOL) yet, but i do believe happiness is found with love (not the "awww, honey-bun!" kind, although it does not exclude romance) service, discipline and sacrifice.
simply doing smth 'bcos i enjoy it' will make u ask << these qns until they drive u crazy. (mauhaha i should know). if ur talent is in art, be generous with it and do smth for the community. imagine the whole world is a big mural and everyone have to paint a square. ur square can be the most beautiful but if u nvr work with ur neighbours then the whole thing may be a disaster ha ha
which is why i have a problem with doing art for art's sake. i can't just do something bcos i like it and then expect/ wait for people to validate it! tt's why i can't do formalistic art, it's not that i can't, but the questions drive me crazy. why? what for? i can enjoy doing so many things and can do them fairly well, but why am i still drifting?
of course as i do and do and practice i cultivate my skills but it has to be for the sake of some higher purpose, even if i'm just starting to ask "now what is that higher purpose/ ideal?" otherwise when i die, then what, my life is in vain??
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